“We don’t put up with the old paradigm, and yet we don’t know how to access or create a new paradigm — the paradigm I call partnership.”

With Alison Armstrong, Author, speaker and thought-leader

Since I first encountered Alison’s work and The Queen’s Code in 2017, I’ve navigated many of my own lessons & challenges with men, Alison’s work is often the place of reason I land and I am so grateful for the insights that have helped me becoming more honouring & trustful towards men.

As well as create a healthier world for myself & those I encounter.

This beautiful conversation with Alison Armstrong that covered so many topics.

This episode is an invitation to notice the paradigms we inherited, the expectations we carry without realising, and the ways we might begin relating from more honesty, curiosity and love. It asks us to consider what becomes possible when we stop trying to control each other, and instead learn how to truly see each other.

In this episode

00:12 ~Welcome to the Flourishing practitioners podcast
00:32 ~ Gabrielle introduces Alison Armstrong and her body of work
03:15 ~ Alison shares the story of her healing hands and her husband’s passing
10:51 ~ Carrying healthy, loving paradigms into the workplace
16:46 ~ Trust, expectations and the dynamics between men and women
17:51 ~ The connection between trust, safety and unspoken expectations
20:42 ~ How disappointment can become a feeling of betrayal
27:26 ~ The difference between what is happening and what seems to be happening
30:29 ~ Seeing our partners more clearly, including what they can and cannot be trusted for
37:45 ~ Listening more deeply as practitioners
38:52 ~ The importance of genuinely meaning the words, tools and skills we are learning
40:37 ~ Moving from control, hierarchy and domination into partnership
53:25 ~ The healing power of ideas and the role of human will in restoration

Notes and references

The Queen’s Code

A fiction book / audiobook that explores the engrained dynamics between men and women and invites us to consider how we contribute to shaping our own relationships through out assumptions, inviting us to see relationships in a new way.

Lovemarks

Kevin Roberts, the CEO of the brand agency Saatchi & Saatchi speaks about Lovemarks over marketing, emphasising the potential organisations have to foster mystery, sensuality and intimacy beyond the typical academic narrative (Roberts, n.d.)

Song: The prayer of Saint Francis ~ Sarah McLachlan

Courses noted in the podcast

Extreme Freedom
The Freedom from being ordinary
Understanding Men & Understanding Women
Understanding Sex & Intimacy

About Alison Armstrong

Alison Armstrong’s exploration of human behaviour began in 1991, with her decision to study men:
“To find out how I was bringing out the worst in them. And hopefully, how to bring out the best.” Her success in understanding men naturally led to studying women’s behavior and making vital connections between the two.

As her work evolved over decades, Alison now illuminates human characteristics that precede and express
themselves regardless of gender, age and upbringing. She distinguishes normal human instincts that compel
both men and women to behave in ways that contradict and undermine our own purposes, goals, values,
needs and relationships.

Besides fulfilling the need to understand “Why” people behave as they do, Alison offers practical,
partnership-based alternatives. Through her seminars, books, online programs and media contributions, she
has been giving millions of people access to more fulfilling lives, loving relationships, stronger families and
productive organizations.

Alison is a sought-after speaker and thought-leader amongst people with the desire to live empowered lives.
Her philosophy and approach are referenced and taught by other authors, speakers, business consultants and
therapists.